A friend once told me not to disregard a gentle whisper in a moment of peace. Today I had such moment.
Lately I have been overwhelmed by the choices 'out there'. Shall I continue with school? Get a job? Pursue this or that... sign up for this... focus on that... In the busy-ness I can get wrapped up in grandiose ideas. Plans!
Yesterday I bumped into grace. A friend of mine happened to be at a local bookstore I frequent with my girls when we have nothing else to do. We got to talking and then moved from there onto lunch with our children. It was nice to chat with a MOM. Someone who gets my desire to focus on my children. Who sees their roll as MOM as a calling from God. I realized how I had gotten wrapped up in being busy, in doing, in wanting, in ambitions which don't necessarily coincide with my first calling as MOM.
Today I was sitting in the grass with my girls. We were laughing together. We were enjoying simply being together. As my girls smiled happily at me I felt peace. I felt grounded. I knew that I was to be in no other place in the world than right there in that moment. That's when the whisper came 'love them'. Gently I played with them, kissed them, enjoyed them. I did not want to leave that moment. Not for greater ambitions, busy plans, selfish desires. Somehow in that moment my desires melted, no plans lay before me, no anxiety deep down, no lists, no regrets, only love. The desire to love and care for my girls overshadowed all.
The simplicity! What Grace! What Joy!